Home and Family

I don’t do drama! (Rant warning)

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

When did our society decide that every annoyance was to be addressed?  Or every disagreement aired and discussed? I realize that I am a grandmother, and so older than many, but I remember my father looking at me and telling me, “Life isn’t fair. Get over it.” (And he was right. Life isn’t fair.) Or, “So? Your point?”  (Lest you think he was uncaring, please note that those comments often came as we discussed the problem over ice cream from the local ice cream parlor.) At the time, it annoyed me to no end.  Now I confess, “Daddy, I GET IT!”  We are able to grow more, learn more, have more joy, and teach more effectively when we are able to “get over it.”

So many times in the recent past someone has asked for my help…for themselves, for a friend or loved one. Don’t get me wrong. If I can help, I am more than willing. The problem? The “help” these folks are seeking comes tightly wrapped up in drama! Layers and layers of it!

Come to my home, and we can discuss religion, academics, child care, organization, running a household, or any other number of topics and have a great time. I will teach you make bread, save money, or write your own curriculum…happily. But please check the whining at the door! I can’t change how your mother-in-law, neighbor, congregation member, or other obnoxious person responds to you or what they say. And neither can you. “Get over it.”  Move on, and prove them wrong. It becomes much harder to argue with what someone is doing when everyone can see that the outcome was a good one!

Besides that, your children are learning to whine, complain, and become victims the more you model that behavior. If you desire them to be strong, motivated, and able to persevere, you must do the same. No one has a perfect life. Anywhere. Stop insisting that life is unfair because you have problems. (If you think there are people who don’t have them, you need to pay better attention to others around you!)  I don’t remember Christ being a complainer.  The Reformers and later Church leaders just got on with the job. We must do the same!

I’m not apathetic to the plight of others; I just have no power to change someone else’s life.  If things need to change, make a different choice.  Do something you haven’t tried.  Or just stop thinking about all the negative. It is amazing how much a positive outlook helps, but drama is exhausting. It can literally make you ill. You miss the joy and beauty of life. And the Lord can’t guide you if you are focused on wallowing in the mire.

So if you want to know how to cook a meal from scratch, plan your literature study, or get a garden planted, let me know. The rest is for you and the Lord to unravel!

(This post is in no way meant to point the finger at those who truly suffer from clinical depression.  But if you do, get professional help.  That is also out of my league!)

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Home and Family, Uncategorized

You’re the mom.

As our family wades even more deeply into the therapy and intervention options as more of the grandchildren are diagnosed with challenges, I find myself truly grateful for good information, but am also reminded of one over-riding truth- “mother’s intuition” is not to be ignored.  Or discounted.  Or ridiculed.  After all, that’s what led us to investigate in the first place!
While many of the recommendations we have received are wonderful, and the resources we have found have added tremendously to our ability to help our children, Mom needs to listen to her heart, and prayerfully implement (or not) those recommendations.
As a society, we have handed over too much of our responsibility to the “experts” and as a result, question ourselves WAY TOO MUCH.

So, repeat after me- “I am the Mom.”  Now say it again- “I am the Mom” ’cause you are. God sent these children to you to raise. You are the grown-up in their life, and they are depending on you to do what is best for them. If the local “expert” and your heart are at odds, take it to the Lord and then move forward with His direction.

After all, you and He are the ultimate “experts” on your child!

Homeschooling, Parenting

Books for working with exceptional children

My library is growing again!  As more of our grandchildren, and the children of those who ask for my help, are diagnosed with syndromes, disorders, and other challenges, the books I have acquired to give me the tools to be successful are increasing in number!  Some are specific to a given situation, but many are invaluable for anyone working with small children. I’m starting with my current fave.

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The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun, Revised Edition: Activities for Kids with Sensory Processing Disorder

by Carol Kranowitz

This book is definitely at the top of my list, and my copy has been loaned to so many people, I find myself borrowing my daughter’s.  The explanatory section is clear and readable, and the exercises are grouped so that you can focus on specific areas that need growth.  The exercises are simple to do, use common household items, and require a minimum amount of preparation time.  We have giggled our way through a number of them!

The companion volume,

Growing an In-Sync Child: Simple, Fun Activities to Help Every Child Develop, Learn, and Grow

By Carol Kranowitz, and Joye Newman

is written for every child, challenged or not.  It goes through activities and exercises you can do with your child in just a few minutes a day to encourage physical, emotional, and overall success.
Today’s children don’t get the same level of activity children did a generation ago.  These books help all of us relearn how to use our whole body, and play using basic items.  Love these books!
Uncategorized

Validation of sorts

This post was written by my oldest daughter. Full of happy news and food-for-thought. Enjoy!

Welcome to my zoo!

For the record, I’ll be referring to the professionals we’ve dealt with by their initials.

We’ve had a really busy few months with lots of appointments. Boo in particular has been to see a lot of different professionals.  Occupational therapy, audiology, speech pathology, auditory processing…loads.  He’s now been diagnosed with sensory processing disorder (like Bug, but other end of the spectrum.  He’s always on overload) and now auditory processing disorder.  Bug is dyslexic on top of the SPD.  Little Man (and Boo?) may have anxiety (no diagnosis yet but NM thinks it’s likely).  So many puzzle pieces and things to look at and ways to adjust life.  It can be a little overwhelming sometimes.

But there’s a theme that’s emerging that I’m excited about.

When we saw CG for Bug’s dyslexia, she was fascinated by his perspective of the world (as am I frequently).  After discussing it for a while…

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Home and Family, Organization, Uncategorized

One evening of work is worth it!

In the past week, there have been a number of reminders to me of why I do some of what I do-such as:

We had apple pie with our Sunday dinner that took me a matter of minutes to put together. How? Bottled apple pie filling. Our family spent one evening last autumn working and have enough pie filling for the entire year ready to go! We use it for pies, crisps, empanadas, etc. So yummy!

Last evening we took an hour and a half and bottled hamburger and beef chunks (I found a great sale and stocked up on each). I now have around three dozen bottles waiting for upcoming meals. Gravies, tacos, enchilladas, spaghetti sauce, soups and chilis, all kinds of things. Quick. Tasty. No sweat.

I realized I was out of carrots for the chicken stock I was making (from the carcasses from Sunday dinner), so I threw in a handful of dried carrots we have in our storage. Easy. No worries.

Our grandson needed a geography assignment for the day. Not all the planning for March was done, so we grabbed a reproducible book of maps and orienteering off the shelf and made a quick copy. Done.

As crazy as my life is, it would be so much more complicated if I didn’t have food storage, a library, and other tools to keep life moving and melt-downs to a minimum. Next…!