Home and Family, Parenting

The importance of home

Spent another afternoon at a follow-up evaluation for one of the grandkids.  One comment made by the therapist continues to ring in my head.  “Often, I will recommend therapy here in clinic, but what really helps is making changes at home, and utilizing strategies there. It’s the little changes and strategies that make the difference.  You’re already doing those.  He doesn’t need therapy; you’ve got this.”

Yes.  The compliment was appreciated by my daughter and I.  But more importantly, it was yet another reminder that what happens in our homes outweighs so many other things.  Whatever challenges, frustrations, set-backs, and bad days come our way, home is the place to tackle them.  Our children need our input and our support more than all the therapy, specialists, and office visits in the world.  I understand that those things are needed, but they cannot take the place of a loving home, parents who take the time to arm themselves with tools for helping each child, and trusting the powers of heaven to help.  Special needs children are just that-special, and their needs can be met by us.  That’s why they were sent to our family.

Nothing will ever take the place of a loving home.  Ever.

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Homeschooling, Parenting

No child is broken (rant warning)

The past few weeks have been a flurry of doctor and therapy appointments for a number of my grandchildren.  There has been so much information disseminated, I will be processing it for weeks!  One lesson stands out above the rest though.  No child is broken!  There are adjustments we as adults need to make when working with children, but that is for us to do.  It isn’t their job make our lives easier.  It is our job to find what they need to help them.

Learning styles differ.  (Did you know that dyslexia is a learning style?  More on that in an up-coming post.)  Abilities and perceptions vary from person to person.  Approaches to learning need to be adjusted to meet the needs of different children.  All of that is do-able.  The problems come when we as parents or care-takers want to be “in charge” of things.  NEWS FLASH- we aren’t “in charge” at all! The Lord sent all His children here with a plan…His plan.  Our job is to find out what it is for each of them and follow it.

Children need to use all they were sent here to use.  Muscles need exercise-expect climbing, running, jumping, throwing, and a ton of other movement.  It is not only normal; it is necessary!

They need your time-as much as you are willing to give them.  They need time to talk, cry, share, learn.  Self-discipline is only developed as the adults around them help them with consistency and follow-through.  If they don’t learn it, it is on us.

Messes follow young ones like day follows night.  That’s okay.  It will give us a chance to experience all those things we wanted to do as children but were stopped because it was “too messy.”  Spend time creating and cleaning together.

Children ask questions-lots of questions.  They aren’t blank slates waiting for someone to write on them; they have opinions, preferences, and interests they came here to express and explore.  Let them pepper you with everything they can come up with through their life.  The joy of discovery is not to be missed!

When we ask them to sit still for long periods of time, be quiet for hours on end, spend hours with a screen (because it is easier than interacting with them ourselves), or do it our way-no questions asked-we are not helping them grow or learn or develop into who they were sent here to become.  Growing up is hard work, and helping it happen can be inconvenient and frustrating, but there is no greater reward than spending time with them and their children…and their children…